1st day of packers. Living room done, store done, kid's bedroom done. Tomorrow, they'll come and finish up the kitchen, and Master room.
And thus ends another chapter of our lives.
This is 5th time we've had packers - first being 2003 when we moved from Makassar to Singapore. We moved from SinMing to Shunfu in 2004 (minor move), to Vietnam in 2008, to Jakarta in 2011, and now to Sydney.
There is a sense of cleansing, as I pack and throw away stuff. Stuff that seemed important 5 years ago, not having touched it once, and quite unlikely I was going to touch it ever again. The passage of time gives a sense of clarity as to what is important, what is valuable. Each move, forces us to re-evaluate our priorities, our belongings, it either gets cast aside or grows in its importance, our sense of attachment.
I brought maybe 4 suits over from Vietnam and got rid of 3, just keeping the suit which I got married in, which surprisingly still fits! From maybe 50 ties, I kept maybe 12, which I think is 12 too many. There could be some remote possibility that I'd need to wear a tie now and then, so no harm keeping a few. And I already imagine my driver with his ill fitting Zegna suit and Armani ties...
I feel a wanton glee as I get rid of stuff, masochistic? maybe. As I grow older, I find that I'd like to live a simple life. Material things don't mean as much any more, branded things lose their sense of worth.
Sure there are things I still keep, that are beyond plain functional - the cards my family gave, old photos, things that can never be replaced by money or time. I love my Tibetan Chests with the chewed leg courtesy of Moppy, our dog in Vietnam, or the glass cabinet we found in in someone's kitchen in Makassar. Each piece is a memory from a chapter of our lives.
When my kids came back from school today, their rooms are bare, living room stacked with boxes. I ask my son if he is sad, and he says.. yes, but I don't want to talk about it. My daughter says... no, why should I? Miss Contrarian... :)
I think about my son's response - it saddens me. Whilst I am quite ready to leave, and look forward to the next chapter of my life, I feel a little sad that my kids have to bear the consequence of our decisions - for better or worse.
Oh yes, it can be for worse. As our experience last year.
How will it be for our younger 2 as we move. It is hard for them to leave their friends. They have settled well here, made good friends, and that will be difficult. Will we turn around in a year and regret our move?
My only hope is that they find a place where they can grow and thrive as Christians, above all else. Deep down, I pray and hope that they find a thriving youth group, where they encourage each other to grow in their love of God. I am not outsourcing their Christian learning to others, but I do realize that as they get older, the role of the parent becomes less.... influential. I want us as a family to love God, each individual wanting to know God more, serve God - and not do it just because mum and dad say so.
Life is full of choices, decisions are full of risks. We hope to do what is best, based on our flawed human understanding, marred with sin, ego and foolishness.
Thankfully, God continues to be Sovereign - thank God! He uses us, despite our sinfulness, our pride and foolishness, and uses the circumstances we find ourselves in, for his purposes. We don't always see how things work out, how they unfold. We continue to be works in progress.
I pray that our move works out. I pray for my kids, to adapt, to grow in their love of Jesus. I pray that we will continue to serve God where we are.
Life is an adventure. And as we finish up here in Jakarta, as we end this chapter, let's see how the next chapter unfolds. It'll be scary, exciting, there'll be moments of joy, moments of heartache.
Watch out Sydney, here we come.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare[a] and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Jeremiah 29:11
No comments:
Post a Comment